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A Relationship Built on Resiliency

  • September 16, 2020

Dr. Lisa Jacobs had low expectations for online dating. So low in fact, that after matching on Tinder in December 2017 with Marinus Kerstens, who goes by Mark, she made sure to eat dinner before their first date, thinking it would be for only a drink. Mr. Kerstens showed up ready for a full meal.

“I was new to this whole online dating thing,” said Mr. Kerstens, 49, who is the senior director of fleet solutions for Rivian, an electric vehicle manufacturer in Palo Alto, Calif. “So we came into this with different expectations right out of the gate.”

It was Mr. Kerstens’s adventurous nature that had drawn Dr. Jacobs, 36, to his profile in the first place. So when he asked her if she wanted to spend the weekend with him at Lake Tahoe, after only three weeks of knowing each other, she agreed. But she snapped a picture of Mr. Kerstens’ license plate while getting in his car on the drive up to Tahoe. She sent it to her friends, joking that if she wasn’t back at work on Monday, they should look for her. Dr. Jacobs is an adjunct clinical assistant professor in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at the Stanford University School of Medicine, the assistant director of the Pegasus Physician Writers at Stanford and a psychiatrist in private practice in Menlo Park, Calif.

“Clearly none of that happened,” Mr. Kerstens said.

“And then it was just like adventure after adventure after that,” Dr. Jacobs said.

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